The Remedy

Today was our third snow day in less than one week. Tomorrow will be our fourth. Tonight we got the email from the school district saying they were closing for another day to keep the kids off the roads. On Facebook, there was a lot of grumbling. Me? I don’t know…I’m okay with it.

This is the first time in my life as a mother that I’m able to just…I don’t know…be okay with it. Yes, I’m way behind on freelance work. Yes, I’m behind on my blogging. Of course, I’m behind on the day job. But for the first time, I feel really at peace with all of it. We’re all behind. Offices are shutting down all over Kansas City, and clients that aren’t located here seem quite understanding of the insane weather that’s hit our area. The pressure I usually feel about to crush me during times like these isn’t here this time…it’s faded away.

About a week ago I took a good, long look at where I’m spending my time. I felt overwhelmed and lost…unsure if I was doing the right thing with my life. My schedule was out of control, but I still constantly felt like I wasn’t doing enough. I had lunch with a fabulous local food blogger I met in Salt Lake City and described my problem. She said it was obvious I was doing too much. My sounding board and mentor, Erin, said the same. It was incredible hearing women who I admire and look up to, and who do so much themselves, say I was overextending. I knew deep down that working every night until 2 a.m. wasn’t a smart plan, but I was in a hole and couldn’t get out.

A day later we were snowed in, and since then, I haven’t feel overwhelmed. I have sledded and built snow forts and shoveled driveways and watched movies and drank wine and took naps. I have stepped back. And it has been perfect.

The timing hasn’t been great. I have deadlines looming and emails piling up. But the snow fell and the kids were home. So I stopped. I watched, I waited, I played…and today, I feel full again.