Happiness Squared
My Queue is Better Than Your Queue
Me: Oh, new Netflix movies came today. That one that you asked me to put in the queue is there.
Trent: I actually got a movie?!
[Insinuates that most of the time I manage the queue so the movies we get are always for me…mostly true. Leaves the room to check said movies.]
Trent: Wait, which one is for me?
Me: I dunno, the one that you emailed me and told me to put in there. I don’t know what it’s about.
Trent: So the other two are for you?
Me: Yeah.
Trent: You rented the entire season of Firefly?!?!
Me: So?
Trent: Well, that’s taking your geekiness to a whole new level, babe…actually, I would watch that with you.
Me: Seriously?!
Trent: Sure, you know what it’s about, right? Didn’t they make a movie after the season was over?
Me: Yeah, Serenity. Already seen it.
Trent: Wow. How in the world did you ever start watching this?
Me: Well, it’s made by the same guy who created Buffy the Vampire Slayer! And Dollhouse! And Dr. Horrible! And it stars Captain Hammer!
Trent: There it is….
On Dads and Kids and Happiness
To all you dads out there, I hope your weekend is full of golf, bourbon, a beer or two, maybe even fishing on a lake. I hope your kids tell you how much you are loved. Because you totally are. Dads are the best.
To the dad in our house, Lucy is so lucky to have you. And she knows it. And so do I.
And to you grandads out there, you have a good one too. May your day be full of homemade cards and envelopes full of special rocks (to the grandpa’s pictured, I hope that doesn’t spoil the surprise). I never knew either of my grandfathers, so watching Lucy with her THREE grandpa’s has been quite an experience for me. Seriously, this kid is ridiculously lucky.
I’d rather be working for a paycheck, then waiting to win the lottery
Marriage is work. Hard, hard work. Those two people up there? Well, they had no effing clue. And thank god for that, or else we probably wouldn’t have made it. Here’s hoping if you have a steady Valentine, you’re getting ready to show each other some love. And if you don’t, here’s hoping you feel like those two crazy kids pictured above. Happy, naive and open to whatever the future holds.
To my Valentine, thanks for putting up with me. I will be proud to stand by your side during the zombie apocolypse. Mostly because you’ll be the one with a well-thought out plan. But also because I love you. And you’re cute. XOXO.
Really, I Just Wanted An Excuse to Say “Vomit Comit”
A few weeks ago, Trent and I were sitting in our kitchen, having a nice Sunday brunch after a VERY rare instance of the whole family sleeping in. Lucy was running around in a tutu or something, and we sat at the table reading newspapers, checking Twitter, discussing the world issues of the day. Until, all of a sudden, this happened:
And yes, I tweeted it. Because, SERIOUSLY?! A zombie action plan?! And then:
Now this is where things get a little hairy. I had a couple of responses via Twitter on the hilarity of the zombie action plan (ZAP?), including one from a sorta-web-famous blogger. When I told Trent about the response, he immediately went to Twitter to see what I’d posted…and then sorta got mad. Ish. Not like, I-wanna-divorce-you-mad, but more like gah-what-the-hell-is-your-problem-woman-mad. Because, let’s face it, I’m an exaggerator. I strech the truth a teeny bit. Or a lot. Depends on what’s funnier. And everyone who knows me knows that it’s just a fact of life. If you do something funny around me, the story will be retold and I will probably make you sound ten feet tall. It’s what I do. I do it here on this website, I do it on Twitter, I do it in real life (have I ever told you how a friend of mine really thought my mom was the CEO of QVC because I used to kiddingly call her that…yeah). So, in order to appease the gods of marital bliss, I posted this:
And that is TOTALLY true.
P.S. In the days following this heated exchange, we received two books on how to survive the zombie apocolypse from Amazon. I swear.
P.P.S. In the spirit of honestly I must tell you something. I have not, nor have I ever had the chance to go to outer space. And my dad never worked for NASA. Wow, that felt good.
P.P.P.S. Technically my dad worked for a state-run program that had a NASA grant. And he was in zero gravity doing experiments. Just not outer space. I never was, because I am lame. He is, in fact, a rock star.
P.P.P.P.S. The plane my dad took to zero gravity is called the “Vomit Comit.” I just think that’s an interesting fact.
The End.
Fin.
Goodbye.
Ciao.
Adios.
