Time to get it all out / adventures in babysitting

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No, you cannot skip dance class.

No, you cannot have another brownie just because your brother did. Stop crying. It’s just a freaking brownie.

Get out of your sister’s room or I’m calling your father!

OK, I’ll just call your coach and tell him you don’t like soccer anymore and want to quit the team, since you can’t manage to put your shoes on.

Yes, I have to go to work. I know your mom doesn’t, but that doesn’t make me “weird.”

You are going to be grounded for the rest of the summer!

We’ve watched this episode of Zoey 101 three times already. No, it is not a different one, it is the EXACT SAME ONE.

No, we cannot get ice cream, we’re late for dance and soccer.

I know you don’t want to go, but the note from your mom says you have to, so YOU HAVE TO.

Ack!

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Why is life so insane? Can anyone tell me? Because my eyes are bulging out of my head and my ears are ringing and I am WAY TOO BUSY! Did I mention that we are traveling or out of the office the next six weekends in a row?! SIX!

So, in honor of this complete insanity, Coldplay decided to release it’s first new single, Violet Hill, on their website for free. They knew how stressed I was and figured it would be a nice gesture. OK, so it probably isn’t totally for me, but I like being the center of the universe and until my eyes stop bulging, I can say whatever I want. Coldplay has a special place in my heart for many reasons, two of the most important being that their concert was the last one I attended before I found out I was pregnant at the ripe age of 22. Technically, it was Lu’s first concert, as she was pleasently gestating during the show. When I went into labor, Trent brought several CD’s he’d made for the occasion, and just happened to look up at the song that was playing as Lu entered the world. It was a song called “We Never Change” from their 2000 album, Parachutes. And holy crap, just listening to it right now made me get goosebumps and tear up and want to run out of my office straight to Lu’s daycare and hold her forever. Take a listen…(excuse the dumb video, it’s an old song and hard to find online…I took what I could get)

OK, let me wipe the tears from my eyes. And then I’m heading directly to the Coldplay Website to download Violet Hill. If you can’t download for whatever reason, you can listen to it directly by going to (gulp) Perez Hilton dot com.

Now, breathe.

Mondays Are So Depressing

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This weekend Lucy turned into a tyrannical two-year-old. Symptoms include the word no, kicking, screaming at pitches only the dog can hear, refusing to go to sleep unless in my bed, running away and saying “bad mommy.” Luckily, the bi-polar attitude of toddlerhood also gave way to lots of hugs, kisses, wrestling sessions, time with the tickle monster, balloon animals and dancing along with street performing violinists.

I choose to remember the good stuff.


Bubble Mania from Megan on Vimeo.

Dear Virus (A Second Letter),

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OK Virus, at first I was a little perturbed by your lack of understanding when it came to leaving my child and the other members of our house alone. But now you’ve gone too far. Now you have turned into strep throat, and have somehow penetrated my exceedingly strong immune barrier. You truly do suck a big one. And don’t worry Virus, I have plenty of time to stay at home. It’s not like I just started a new job a month ago and have already taken five sick days due to you….oh wait, yes I have!

On another note, Virus, I’m not sure if you ever read WebMD, but kids under three rarely get strep. So rarely, in fact, that our pediatrician INSISTED not to get Lucy tested for it, even though I tested positive. So imagine my surprise when I ignored his advice, got her tested anyway, and it came out positive as well. You sure are tricky, Virus. You should have seen the nurse tech’s face when the two lines on the test turned pink, after she had spent the last ten minutes telling me what I could do for Lu when it came out negative. Ha, ha! Take that Medical Industry!

Good one, Virus. But we’re definitely done now. If all the antibiotics don’t kill you, I’ll reach down my throat and kill you myself. Because I miss swallowing. And sleeping.

Best regards,
Megan

Dear Virus,

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I get it, you like us and you don’t want to leave. That’s understandable, we’re a fun group. We go to parks and we watch movies and we wrestle around the house on weekends. Sometimes we even have picnics or go to fancy restaurants. I get that you want to tag along, but you’re just not welcome anymore.

Four weeks is overstaying your welcome. At first, I thought you were just a cute little cold. I mean, what’s the big deal? One night up because of a fever, one runny nose and a few coughs here and there. But after the third Friday in a row where I was up the entire night (why is it always on Friday?), I decided I am done with you. And all of the members of my house agree.

I think Lucy would like to once again taste her food and maybe even smell it. I know I would like to spend my 2 a.m.’s sleeping and not cleaning up old hot dog bits that have been regurgitated on to the floor. And though Trent told me it was very sexy as I stood there half naked, covered in puke, attempting to start a bath, I think he may have been kidding.

So, Virus, I think we are officially ready for you to leave now. I did enjoy all the cuddling and the days spent in the big bed with Nemo, but it’s starting to get warm outside and I need to change out of my pajamas. So get out!

Yours,
Megan

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