More Music Friday – The More You Try to Erase Me, The More That I’ll Appear
This is my farewell to summer song. Happy Labor Day weekend, everyone!
More Music Friday – The John Hughes Edition
When Trent got home last night the first words out of my mouth were “Did you hear…?” and he quickly cut me off with “Yes, I know, John Hughes died. Are you going to get all angsty now?”
It’s no secret that I’m a huge John Hughes fan. Maybe it’s because my sister is fourteen years older than I am, so at the age of five I thought I was an troubled teen like her. I remember watching The Breakfast Club over and over in high school and being amazed that hardly any of my friends knew what I was talking about. My only solice was my high school boyfriend, who, like me, spent most Friday nights watching Pretty in Pink or St. Elmo’s Fire (and sometimes Howard the Duck, but that’s a whole other story).
And as I’ve watched all today’s teen a-holes get famous, I couldn’t help but hope good ole’ Johnny would make another teen hit and show us again what real kids are like. Not packaged pop stars who send naked photos via text message, but normal, everyday kids with problems that are relatable. John Hughes was different. He wasn’t Hollywood, he wasn’t just another studio big wig. He really cared. About his fans, about his actors, about his family and friends. It showed in his work, and in the people who worked with him. (If you haven’t read this story yet, you should. Even if you’re not a Hughes fan, you’ll be touched.)
We should celebrate the happy, and since it’s More Music Friday and Mr. Hughes had so many iconic musical moments in his films, I figured I’d share some with you all. But then I looked around the web and all the great moments I wanted to share are either invisible online or have been copyrighted so they can’t be shared here. So instead I’ll leave you with Ferris, on a float, singing Twist and Shout and my favorite Brat Pack mashup of all time, by the wonderful band Phoenix. Feel the happy, people. RIP John Hughes, you are already very missed.
Mean Girls
The other day I headed to Lulu’s school to pick her up after a very long workday. I was exhausted, both mentally and physically, from a long holiday weekend and the work pileup that resulted from it. I checked the classroom first, then realized that the kids were out on the playground and rushed outside to grab Lu, as we were (of course) running late for her first swimming lesson. On the playground I noticed two little girls being talked to by a teacher in the corner, while Lu and another girl were riding bikes. The other girl’s mother was there too, and as the four of us walked out of the playground, a teacher stopped us.
“I just wanted to let you know that the girls have had a rough afternoon. They [points to Lu, the other girl, and the two little girls in the corner] have been fighting, saying mean things to one another, basically a girl fight.”
And then, “I just really never expected this out of girls this young. The older girls, yes, but not these ones.”
The other mother and I just stood there, looking like we were in trouble ourselves, our heads hanging and mumbling “sorry” to the teacher who stopped us. We both told her that we’d have talks about being nice to our friends and the four of us shuffled out of the park. The other little girl yelled that she wanted Lu to come for a playdate, and Lu asked the same. We both said no, maybe next time, and exchanged a look.
When we got in the car for the trip home, I asked Lu what had happened.
“Well, Mia* and Jenny told Emily [the girl that Lu was playing with when I picked her up] that we don’t like her anymore and she’s not our friend and she can’t play with us.”
“Did you tell her that? Did you say anything to Emily?”
“No.”
“Were you nice to her?”
“I just stayed with Jenny and Mia. Emily got really sad.”
At that point, I almost started bawling. I mean, I was ready for an outsider, a nerd who reminded me of myself as a kid. But I never, ever expected I’d have to deal with Lulu being one of the mean girls. I’d always assumed she’d be the one on the other side, getting teased, not the one doing the teasing. And I couldn’t believe we were already talking about this stuff. I mean, she’s THREE!
After a few days to reflect (and many, many talks about treating people kindly), I’ve started to look at the situation a bit differently. I suppose a big reason is because Lulu’s daily teacher told me she’s had to talk to the girls several times about being nice, but Lucy always seems oblivious, and if she’s in the middle of it, it’s strictly because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. She even told me, “I’d never expect that out of Lucy. She loves everyone. And everyone loves her.”
Another part of me has started to get a bit angry. I mean, why do we have to label these kids as “mean girls” at three and four years old. Why can’t females at any age disagree or argue without being labeled at all? I mean, geez, if these were boys, we’d be all “Well, boys can be boys,” but with girls we make a big deal out of it. I understand that boys and girls are different, and fight differently, but if a boy would have done this, I’m sure we’d just be thanking him for not hitting or resorting to violence. “Use your words,” we’d say. But when girls do it, they’re “mean girls.” Why?
I suppose all I can do is keep teaching Lu to value friendships and kindness, and continue to make it very clear that I won’t tolerate a “mean girl” in my home. I guess encouraging the nerd in her can’t hurt either. I mean, we don’t want her to end up all Lindsey Lohan-ed out at age twenty-three, right?
Confessions
My daughter ran off with our American flag the other day, letting it drag all over the ground and get covered in dirt. I think that may be illegal.
Today I purchased a large floppy hat by justifying a vacation I might get to take (maybe) in August. Yes, a large hat. That is floppy.
I make fun of my mom for her QVC addition, but I can see how easy it can be to get in over your head. Online shopping is the devil.
My first kiss was so lovely and romantic, I hate remembering that it was with a total 13-year-old douchebag.
I sometimes wonder if I actually want more kids, or if we should just stay the happy little family we are now. Three is the magic number, or so they say.
Lately I have felt so uninspired, I haven’t wanted to write a word on this blog, knowing it would all come out negative. I’m afraid I might be all out of stories.
I have a very creative friend that wants to start a business with me. The thought of it gets me so excited, but then I remember that this family already owns a business and two entrepreneurs in one marriage could very well equal a crowd. But I can’t help wondering “what if?”
Summer Vacation
Hi there, it’s me! Yes, me! I’m here, on the blog, writing something! Amazing, isn’t it!
I feel like I owe everyone an explanation to where I’ve been and why I haven’t been writing as much as I normally do. But then I remember that only three people read this thing anyway, and you all know me well enough to know when I need space, I will certainly take it.
And really, that’s it. There has been so much going on in my offline world, that I haven’t had the time to sit down and document it like I enjoy doing. Both good and bad.
So I figured, in a grumply fashion, I’d write about not writing. Because when I do that, it usually leads to more writing. Because I’m certifiably insane.
And now I’m off to brave the 105 degree weather with 80 percent humidity, by taking Lu to the pool. Maybe I’ll Tweet about it. Maybe I’ll take a daily photo. Maybe I’ll even post a song . But I probably won’t write about it here.
For now.
