Mid-Day Laugh Attack
Some of you will understand the signficance, some of you won’t. But everyone will enjoy Mr. Shatner. This I can guarantee.
Tale of the Non-Geek
I know, there’s always an excuse, but this time I really do have a problem. Besides my normal problems. My computer officially thinks it is Sunday, January 11, 1970. Now, I think this is strange for several reasons. Number one, I was not alive in 1970. Number two, this website obviously did not exist in 1970. And number three, this computer did not exist in 1970. There is a possiblity that my computer is having a mid-life crisis and is trying to pretend it is a spry young laptop. Maybe some sort of anxiety now that the new Mac’s have come out making my dear Macaroni look like an old hag…
Whatever the reason, this strange series of events along with the fact that I’m in my third trimester now, which makes me unable to do about anything except for eat and sleep and bitch, I haven’t been updating as much as I should. Part of it is also that I don’t feel like I have much to say. Ahhh, the life of a human incubator. I was looking back at some older posts and realized I am much funnier when I have drunk stories to tell. I think I’m one of those people that isn’t to fun whist sober.
To appease you [that is assuming people are still visiting this site] here is a link to a retro post about my pre-baby life. I actually wasn’t that exciting then, either.
Oh yeah, and the Bearded Wonder turned off comments because of spammers. Sorry. They’ll be turned back on as soon as we can.
It’s only TUESDAY?
It becomes plainly obvious it’s going to be a long week when not only are you out of underwear, but there are dishes all over the living room floor. Some of them have orange peals in them, while others have tasty noodles. And the poor dog just sits and stares at them all day, waiting for permission to feast!
My First Mistake (well…maybe not my first)
Watching Grey’s Anatomy whist carrying a child, therefore causing all normal human emotion to explode out of my ears! Trent bought the first season on DVD and I was so enthralled by Dr. McDreamy and how cute and sweet he used to be back before he screwed Meredith over by choosing his snotty ex-wife over her. I found myself screaming at the TV, don’t do it Meredith! He may love you and may be sweet underneath his husbandly exterior, but he is a waffling idiot who will never make up his mind!
Plus, before all of this Dr. McDreamy crap he had to PAY a cheerleader to date him. And he was related to Candace Bergen. Not sounding so hot anymore, huh?
Who am I kidding, of course he’s still hot. And they just need to be together! And Meredith needs to stop humping GEORGE! WHY IS SHE HUMPING GEORGE! When I was in Vegas, I was very concerned about missing Grey’s, so I attempted to stay awake by taking a lovely bath in a HUGE tub. Staying at the Mandalay Bay does have advantages, even if the tub was made for two and I was only sharing it with my giant, hulking belly. Anyhow, this bath actually put me to sleep and I woke up with the TV on and MEREDITH TAKING OFF GEORGE’S SHIRT! Why! Why!
Crap. What am I going to do tonight if Drew falls and that slutty Stacy wins it all? I may just implode. Or have to turn off the TV.
Whatever Happened to Lazy Sunday?
The few of you that still actually read this on a daily basis may have noticed the lack of postings the past week. You probably blame me, but I blame the cold/sinus infection that has taken over my body from the lungs up. I also blame the very large project we just sold at my work which has caused me to work more than I did before this whole baby-in-stomach-thing. And finally, I blame Murphy’s Law. Usually I am overwhelmed with all of the things I DON”T have going on in my personal life. Somehow this week, anyone who could need/ask me to do something, did just that. Very strange considering the amount of time I usually spend per week adjusting the antena on the TV to get rid of snow over [insert primetime television program of the day here].
Monday – Taxes at Trent’s new accountant. I spent most of the meeting staring at her business card attempting not to spontaneously burst into flames as I read the word “supior” over and over again. The journalist in me was screaming, SPELLCHECK BEFORE YOU OK THE PROOF!!!
Tuesday – $5 for a primetime performance of “Car Wash” by the Junior Dazzlers dance group at halftime of a high school girls basketball game. The game, a bit frightening. Those girls were damn huge! But the show, adorable, of course. Baby Taquita kicked the crap out of me the whole time. Apparently she would also like to be a Junior Dazzler.
Wednesday – Prenatal yoga. I have joined the farters. Actually, I think they may ask me to be their leader.
Thursday – Original Plan: Have dinner with friends, including Theresa who was in from NY. Actual Plan: Original plan amended by Mara because she could not miss The OC. Ended up driving to Lawrence to eat pizza shuttle and watch Fox Thursday night. Tried to turn the group to Dancing with the Stars, but apparently THAT is too dorky.
Friday – Sinuses take over my body and claim their new found land in the name of Sudafed. I lay in bed for 14 hours straight in an attempt to overcome the virus, which just leads to a horrible case of bed head and tissues covering the floor. I did, however, manange to climb out of my cave long enough to get some ice cream from Sonic. A girl has to have her priorities.
Saturday/Sunday – Began the task of figuring out how we’re going to create a nursery without spending money we do not have. Involves lots of moving of furniture, cleaning, disinfecting, and not much showering. Also involves bog people on PBS.
There you go. We’re all caught up. Surprising how much I did, yet how boring it all seems…
