Take Cover

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This is a week that will go down in infamy. On Tuesday evening, myself and four of my best friends in the world will descend from our different cities of origin (Brooklyn, Manhattan, Lawrence, somewhere in Alabama, and Kansas City) on the Sprint Center in downtown KC for a once in a lifetime event.

New Kids on the Block. Live. In concert. Bring on the leg warmers and slap bracelets, bitches.

In preparation for the big night, three of us got together in our hometown for the first time in months to have a drinking test run. Here’s what I learned that night:

1. This song makes us feel like we’re sixteen again. In a good way. Especially when it’s on constant repeat and we request it at every drinking establishment we visit.

It’s like Britney knew this event was coming up, so she got her shit together just in time.

[Yes, I know this isn’t my normal musical taste. But if you’ve ever been out with these girls, you’d understand. It’s effing infectious.]

2. Holy crap, Mara is an awful driver! The quote of the evening (besides “Womanizer, womanizer, oh you’re a womanizer baby”) would have to be “Don’t worry guys, Nissans don’t flip.”

3. We held a wicked dance off in a “club” that seemed similar to this:

But in reality, it was much closer to this:

4. True Blood is possibly the stupidist show I’ve ever seen. I mean, I love vampires as much as the next gal, but seriously…Sookie? Which means I will obviously be obsessed with the show in a short time….

What?

Oh, sorry, I was just watching clips of True Blood on YouTube. Crap. Nevermind.

5. Blogging is not appreciated by everyone. And Twittering is somewhat reviled.

“I just don’t understand why you need to put all your feelings out there. I mean, why?”

“Because I am an attention whore who cannot help but blab on and on and on about herself. Jeez, don’t you know me at all?!” [Storms off in huff, takes shot, falls down]

Now I must go nap, for Donnie, Danny, Johnny, Jordon and Joey cannot wait for a sleepy, hungover suburban mother to get her crap together.

Hangin’ Tough

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I’m sick. I have a cold. It seems too early for this sort of crap, right? I mean, wasn’t it just summer? Now it’s flipping freezing outside and I’m sleeping with a humidifier and a box of tissues. Blech. The coughing has become so intense that yesterday my boss told me to get the heck out of the office before I got everyone sick.

This weekend I’m heading to Manhattan to drink a-plenty with some of my very best friends, many of whom I haven’t seen in months. So in preparation I’ve been mainlining Zicam and sleeping while doused in Vicks Vapor Rub. It’s super-sexy, just ask Trent. But I have to get better! For not only do I have many rum punches to drink this weekend, I have a couple of big events next week. There’s Trent and I’s third wedding anniversary, my work retreat to the Ameristar Casino in St. Louis and one big surprise event…here’s a hint:

Are you jealous yet?

Update on the 100 Things List

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A few months back I wrote this list of 100 Things I want to do in my lifetime. It was an exercise inspired by Maggie Mason, who said creating this type of list has changed her life in dramatic ways. Well, my life has dramatically changed, for sure, but most of the things I’ve crossed of my list have happened by chance. Here’s what I’ve done since writing the list last Spring:

2. Purchase my own house – DONE – October 2008

31. Turn off my phone for a day – DONE – August 2008, Family Reunion in Steamboat Springs, Colorado

45. Attend a political rally – DONE – October 2008, Barack Obama “Change We Need Rally” in Kansas City

46. Donate to charity anonymously – DONE – October 2008, but I can’t tell you who or that ruins it!

47. Drink wine in Central Park – DONE – May 2008, Theresa’s Wedding

50. Reconnect with an old friend – DONE – June 2008, name removed to protect the friendly

88. Make enough money to support my family – DONE – March 2008

92. Drink a fancy cocktail on the roof of an apartment building in NYC – DONE (sort of, close enough, technically not an “apartment” building) – May 2008, Theresa’s Wedding

94. Go for a week without checking email – DONE – August 2008, Peters Family Reunion

At this rate, I’ll have all one hundred things completed by the time I’m eighty! But still, I’m proud I crossed anything off this list. What have you done in the last few months that you’ve always wanted to do?

On Being Blunt

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Yesterday I was at the drugstore purchasing some much needed pharmacuetical accessories, when I decided to pick up a tube of lip color. Okay, I know it seems like I’ve been talking about make-up a bit more than normal lately (especially since I don’t believe I ever wrote about make-up before last week), but this is going somewhere. I needed something that will stay on all day, as I hate touching up my makeup and HAAAATTTTTEEE leaving lipstick/gloss stains on a glass when I’m out with a client. Blech.

I purchased this stuff, which was recommended to me via Mighty Goods. I went back and forth on what color to get, as I’m a bit of a pansy and I don’t believe I’ve ever worn red lipstick in my life. I’m all about chapstick and clear gloss, but it’s Fall and I painted my kitchen orange and I’m feeling risky, so I bought a color called Wine. It’s super red, like Gwen Stefani red or Christina Aguilera red. Red.

I put it on this morning while Lu sat beside me in the bathroom, attempting to secretly eat her tube of kids’ toothpaste. When Trent heard her yelling after I refused to let her eat said toothpaste, he came in to see what all the fuss was about. He looked at me, cocked his head to the side and said, “That lipstick is way too dark.”

Ouch, that one stung a bit at six o’clock in the morning. And I thought it looked so cute!

He followed that up with, “I mean, you look like the Joker. The latest one. The one that died.”

Charmed, I’m sure.

So, I’m leaving it up to you, dear readers. Is this too red? Scary? A bit like an evil comic book villian?

Red Lipstick

And yes, I do realize I need a haircut. But other than that, I’m probably the best candidate for America’s Next Top Model. I am just so darn gorgeous! And modest.

A Snippet

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We’re driving down the highway after a long day spent cleaning out our old residence. It’s just Lu and I, myself covered in splotches of floor cleaner and smudges of dirt dotting my forehead. I can see Lucy in the rearview mirror, sucking her thumb and twirling a strand of hair around her finger. Her eyes are sleepy. She’s just come from her Aunt Mikayla and Uncle Heath’s house, where she napped through our cleaning marathon. In an attempt to get her into the car quickly, I just scooped her out of the make-shift bed and into her carseat, sans pants or shoes. The 30 minute drive to our new home is boring for her, I can tell.

I turn on the radio and start checking the dial for anything but a commerical for hair removal surgery (seriously, are people in Kansas City that hairy?). I turn to a mix station and hear a familiar beat. I crank up the volume and start bopping around in my seat. George Michael’s voice booms through the speakers, telling me that I gotta have faith. I peek in my rearview mirror and see Lu’s face light up. She starts bouncing around to the beat. We both are singing along.

“I gotta have faithafaithafaith-ahhhh!”

This is why I love my kid. She’s unequivocally the most awesome person in the world.

Try not to sing along, I double dare you.

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