Lately I’ve been all about the positivity here on this site and all other online areas. For such a long time I was just such a drain on the web…just wah wah wah wah about everything and anything. So much so that I even created the Grumples section on this site. But as my life changed and I (ahem) matured, I tried to make a concerned effort to keep my grumpy ranting to myself, instead focusing on my glass being half full.
But listen, people, I haven’t sleep through the night in MONTHS and the baby isn’t even here yet! So, damnit, I’m grumpy. And maybe if I just get it all out, I will feel better.
A few weeks back Trent took Lucy with him on a Secret Shopping excursion that he was participating in with one of his company’s partners. He had asked how I felt about Lucy’s participation, as this Secret Shopper experience was to take place at a pediatrician’s office (hence, the need for Lu to attend). I told him I wasn’t totally comfortable with it, but if he thought it was a good idea, I’d let him make the call. Note: This was a mistake. I should always make the call. The office apparently didn’t have separate waiting rooms for sick and well patients, and about two days later Lu came down with the WORST COLD EVER. Now, Trent will tell you that this cold could have come from anywhere, preschool, dance class, the playplace at the local Chic-Fil-A….that’s crap. It obviously came from this damn doctor’s office. How do I know? Because THIS IS ALL TRENT’S FAULT AND BECAUSE I SAID SO.
Side-effects of aforementioned cold equal not sleeping, coughing, sneezing, coughing, coughing, sounding like a cat with a hairball, and never-ending whining. Also, Lu wakes up at approximately 3:30 or 4 a.m. every morning coughing and crying. Now, if it was 2 a.m. or earlier, I would just dose her with some nightime cough medicine and send her on her merry way. I am an awesome parent. But as it’s later (earlier?) I can’t give her said medicine because the kid will then be knocked out and won’t get up for school on time. Which means I’m late for work, since I do preschool pick up and drop off. Which means I walk into yet ANOTHER meeting late and pregnant and hungry and grumpy and obviously I’m promoted and given a raise. Or not. More like not.
In order to try and avoid the nightime wake up we have tried the following: Nightime cough medicine before bed, cough suppressent, a humidifier in her room at night, a humidifier with cough reducing vapor stuff, Vicks vapor rub (both on the chest and on the feet like the crazy Internet told me to), a spoonful of honey, ice cold water, sacrificing my soul to satan and just ignoring the coughing until she finally almost chokes herself and throws up in her bed. Again, I am an awesome parent. You can just stop applauding now.
Obviously, the above treatments have not worked, as she keeps ending up in our bed at the same time, coughing her little head off. And by that point in the evening, I have probably already gotten a smashing 3 hours of sleep due to the hourly pee breaks I must take as Taco John performs karate in my stomach. I’m all, “Grasshopper, you need to chillax,” and he’s all “Eff you lady, hi-yaaa!” She lays in our bed, between the two of us, and it goes like this. Coughing fit, begs for water, coughing fit, 5 minutes of quiet, I start to fall asleep, she starts singing, I wake again, she asks for water, she tells me I’m pretty, coughing fit, starts talking about random crap that happened at school, coughing fit. Repeat.
Now, on top of all of that, she wants me to look at her, 2 inches from her face as she coughs. When I roll over with my back to her, she cries, “Mommy, I need you to look at meeeeeee!” And so I roll back over and she coughs in my face.
After about two hours of this, the coughing batteries run out and she falls asleep. As soon as she’s out, she rolls over and snuggles up with Trent, where they both remain until I attempt to wake them as I run out the door to work. After I tell them to get up about eleventy billion times, turn on all the lights, noisily get ready for the day, I finally shake them both and say, “I’m leaving. You figure out how to get to school on your own.” Then they both bounce up, oh no no no, you can’t leave!!! We need you!
At this point I usually bribe Lu to get dressed using jellybeans. Then we fight over what she is going to wear for about 15 minutes. Even though we pick out her outfits the night before and agree on them. Doesn’t matter. It’s always a battle. And she’s tired and sick, so it’s even worse. If it’s not one of three favorite dresses, I’m pretty much screwed. The other day she went to school in sweatpants, jelly sandals and a rhinestone studded thermal t-shirt.
I don’t think I’ve mentioned what an awesome parent I am.
Point being (really? I guess…) today I was talking to Trent’s mom on the phone. She wants to take Lu to her farm for a few days and I was warning her it may not be very fun with Sickly McSickpants coughing all night. She said to me, “Oh I heard. Trent said between you peeing all night and Lucy’s coughing, he isn’t sleeping very well.”
Really?
REALLY??!?!?!?!?!!!
Next time she wakes up coughing, I’m literally going to take her to our bed, place her coughing face right in front of Trent’s and take off for the nearest Holiday Inn. Just try and stop me.
http://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.png00Meganhttp://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.pngMegan2010-10-06 14:36:332010-10-06 14:36:33Grumples (because it's about time)
My lovely friend (and former NYC + KC partner in crime) Theresa was interviewed by the Associated Press for an article on composting in Brooklyn. So far, the story has been picked up by several outlets, including Yahoo! and the Seattle Times. You can find more photos here or read the article here.
Congrats, T!
http://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.png00Meganhttp://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.pngMegan2010-10-05 10:45:282010-10-05 10:45:28My Friends Are Awesome
As I tend to be from time to time, I’ve been a bit overwhelmed with all of these dang responsibilities that being a mom, wife, IT consultant, Power Point operator, writer and primetime television watcher entails. So, in order to ease the burden a bit, I’ve decided to ask people to be Guest Bananas, AKA guest writers on this site. This Guest Banana post was written by my good friend, and fellow watcher of awful television, Mara. Take it away, Mara!
————————————
Well hello there interweb. If you have followed the wonderful Crazybananas for a while, you will know me as “The Mara”. I used to leave 17 page comments on posts, usually having nothing to do with the actual post itself and just updating Megan and her followers on my college days. I was awesome. Megan has asked me, knowing my awesomeness, to guest post on her wonderful website as she is busy being a wonderful mother, wife and working girl (not prostitute) [ed note: Thanks for clarifying that I’m not a prostitute, Mara] and not to mention growing a Pirate King in her womb. Her life is crazy and I am thankful for every day that I get to spend time with her and her beautiful family. Enough gushing about her, seriously though, look at the freaking family pictures. Like, are you kidding me!?
It took me 2 seconds to determine what I wanted to write about, it went something like this (via text):
Megan: P.S. would you do a guest post on my website?
Me: OF COURSE! Vampires, werewolves and aliens?!
Megan: Perfect!
So, I’m sitting here trying to determine how to organize my thoughts about the following topics: vampires, werewolves, aliens and wizards (preferably of the Ginger variety). This is hard. I could write on and on and on and on about the things that entertain me the most. I’ll keep it short and sweet…yea, right.
Wizards: “I’d be sleazy for Ron Weasley”- Yes. Yes, I would. Especially the older, not as awkward, super adorable Ron Weasley. Damn that Hermione Granger. What can I say? I have a thing for awkward Gingers.
As for the Harry Potter Series? Thank you for existing. I am going to cry like a 3 year old when the second movie for The Deathly Hallows comes out. It really can’t be ending, really!? Ugh. The books are amazingly written and while the movies have rarely lived up to my standards they are amazing as well. I highly recommend those who are obsessed with the Twilight series to check out an actual well written series of awesomely addicting books that don’t make you feel like your IQ has dropped 90 points.
Vampires and Werewolves: I love vampires. I also love werewolves. Now please don’t confuse this with me believing that vampires and werewolves exist. While it is entirely possible and would be awesome, my common sense does take over, sometimes. Megan introduced me to Twilight and Moonlight which opened the flood gates to all popular vampire “pop culture†(True Blood, Vampire Diaries, etc). And for that, I am eternally grateful. Seriously. I have had some of the best times hanging out with my BFF’s, drinking (even not drinking sometimes, I know, weird, right!?) and watching awesomely bad vampire shows/movies. They are cheesy, drama filled and full of smoking hot men. Delicious. I’m not sure what I’m trying to get across here except that I think these series/sagas have taught me to not take myself too seriously. If I had, I would have missed out on lots of laughs and good times with friends. For a future post I will prepare an essay comparing Twilight, Moonlight, True Blood and Vampire Diaries and have Megan post it as she will be busy being a mom for the second time (yay!!). This is something I’ve joked about for awhile but I really should get a start on it, because, really, what else do I have to do?
Aliens:
One word: Roswell. [Ed note: The clips in this section are different…yes I know the screen caps look the same. F’ing Hulu. Trust, you want to click on both. The truth is out there. Wait, wrong aliens…]
Introduced into my life by, guess who!? (Who else thinks that Megan introduces these things to my life to ensure herself a bad/cheesy T.V./movie watching buddy? I do. But I love it.) Roswell thoroughly entertained me for the 2 days it took me to watch the entire series. Alright, alright, it was more than 2 days but honestly if I didn’t have to work or sleep, I would have just watched every episode straight through. That good. And cheesy. And full of hotness monsters (and Max’s body, holy cow. Take your shirt off more often, please!?). Aliens do exist. As current events prove, they are watching/deactivating nuclear weapons. Awesome. Anywho, Roswell is about normal teenagers just trying to live their lives. Half of them are aliens: Max, Michael and Isabel. Michael, by far the fan favorite, is the bad boy. With the bad hair, which ends up being charming…well in that cheesy way. Teenage angst ensues. Really that’s all you need to know. They battle with the same problems as normal teenagers: relationships, lisps, parent problems and money woes, but better because they aren’t from this planet!
Shocking and amazing! I suggest and encourage the renting/buying of these DVD’s and maybe starting a website to get the cast back together for a movie reunion (I would, but I’m too lazy). That would be awesome and I would pee my pants with excitement!!
Alright, summation time, I love wizards, werewolves, vampires and aliens. The above is a scrabble brained attempt to show this. Also, Megan has destroyed any chance of me living a normal life. Harsh but true. Most of the above obsessions have occurred because of or have increased in nature due to the lovely blonde lady with the beautiful family. She has convinced me (really twisting my arm and forcing me) to watch every Cutting Edge (except one that even Megan deemed unwatchable) and 2 of the 3 Step Up films. Yes, I called them films. It just gets better and better. And to her I say, Thank you. Thank you for letting me be me and ensuring me a safe place, without criticism to enjoy the nerdy things in life. And thank you to all the creative people that have brought these characters to life for me to enjoy. Seriously, I wish I had a quarter of the imagination of J.K. Rowling.
Interweb, watch some vampires, werewolves, aliens and wizards, laugh and enjoy life, don’t take it too seriously.
Grumples (because it’s about time)
/3 Comments/in Grumples, Lucy, Pregnancy, Trent /by MeganLately I’ve been all about the positivity here on this site and all other online areas. For such a long time I was just such a drain on the web…just wah wah wah wah about everything and anything. So much so that I even created the Grumples section on this site. But as my life changed and I (ahem) matured, I tried to make a concerned effort to keep my grumpy ranting to myself, instead focusing on my glass being half full.
But listen, people, I haven’t sleep through the night in MONTHS and the baby isn’t even here yet! So, damnit, I’m grumpy. And maybe if I just get it all out, I will feel better.
A few weeks back Trent took Lucy with him on a Secret Shopping excursion that he was participating in with one of his company’s partners. He had asked how I felt about Lucy’s participation, as this Secret Shopper experience was to take place at a pediatrician’s office (hence, the need for Lu to attend). I told him I wasn’t totally comfortable with it, but if he thought it was a good idea, I’d let him make the call. Note: This was a mistake. I should always make the call. The office apparently didn’t have separate waiting rooms for sick and well patients, and about two days later Lu came down with the WORST COLD EVER. Now, Trent will tell you that this cold could have come from anywhere, preschool, dance class, the playplace at the local Chic-Fil-A….that’s crap. It obviously came from this damn doctor’s office. How do I know? Because THIS IS ALL TRENT’S FAULT AND BECAUSE I SAID SO.
Side-effects of aforementioned cold equal not sleeping, coughing, sneezing, coughing, coughing, sounding like a cat with a hairball, and never-ending whining. Also, Lu wakes up at approximately 3:30 or 4 a.m. every morning coughing and crying. Now, if it was 2 a.m. or earlier, I would just dose her with some nightime cough medicine and send her on her merry way. I am an awesome parent. But as it’s later (earlier?) I can’t give her said medicine because the kid will then be knocked out and won’t get up for school on time. Which means I’m late for work, since I do preschool pick up and drop off. Which means I walk into yet ANOTHER meeting late and pregnant and hungry and grumpy and obviously I’m promoted and given a raise. Or not. More like not.
In order to try and avoid the nightime wake up we have tried the following: Nightime cough medicine before bed, cough suppressent, a humidifier in her room at night, a humidifier with cough reducing vapor stuff, Vicks vapor rub (both on the chest and on the feet like the crazy Internet told me to), a spoonful of honey, ice cold water, sacrificing my soul to satan and just ignoring the coughing until she finally almost chokes herself and throws up in her bed. Again, I am an awesome parent. You can just stop applauding now.
Obviously, the above treatments have not worked, as she keeps ending up in our bed at the same time, coughing her little head off. And by that point in the evening, I have probably already gotten a smashing 3 hours of sleep due to the hourly pee breaks I must take as Taco John performs karate in my stomach. I’m all, “Grasshopper, you need to chillax,” and he’s all “Eff you lady, hi-yaaa!” She lays in our bed, between the two of us, and it goes like this. Coughing fit, begs for water, coughing fit, 5 minutes of quiet, I start to fall asleep, she starts singing, I wake again, she asks for water, she tells me I’m pretty, coughing fit, starts talking about random crap that happened at school, coughing fit. Repeat.
Now, on top of all of that, she wants me to look at her, 2 inches from her face as she coughs. When I roll over with my back to her, she cries, “Mommy, I need you to look at meeeeeee!” And so I roll back over and she coughs in my face.
After about two hours of this, the coughing batteries run out and she falls asleep. As soon as she’s out, she rolls over and snuggles up with Trent, where they both remain until I attempt to wake them as I run out the door to work. After I tell them to get up about eleventy billion times, turn on all the lights, noisily get ready for the day, I finally shake them both and say, “I’m leaving. You figure out how to get to school on your own.” Then they both bounce up, oh no no no, you can’t leave!!! We need you!
At this point I usually bribe Lu to get dressed using jellybeans. Then we fight over what she is going to wear for about 15 minutes. Even though we pick out her outfits the night before and agree on them. Doesn’t matter. It’s always a battle. And she’s tired and sick, so it’s even worse. If it’s not one of three favorite dresses, I’m pretty much screwed. The other day she went to school in sweatpants, jelly sandals and a rhinestone studded thermal t-shirt.
I don’t think I’ve mentioned what an awesome parent I am.
Point being (really? I guess…) today I was talking to Trent’s mom on the phone. She wants to take Lu to her farm for a few days and I was warning her it may not be very fun with Sickly McSickpants coughing all night. She said to me, “Oh I heard. Trent said between you peeing all night and Lucy’s coughing, he isn’t sleeping very well.”
Really?
REALLY??!?!?!?!?!!!
Next time she wakes up coughing, I’m literally going to take her to our bed, place her coughing face right in front of Trent’s and take off for the nearest Holiday Inn. Just try and stop me.
My Friends Are Awesome
/0 Comments/in follow friday, Guest Banana, Nerd Herd /by MeganMy lovely friend (and former NYC + KC partner in crime) Theresa was interviewed by the Associated Press for an article on composting in Brooklyn. So far, the story has been picked up by several outlets, including Yahoo! and the Seattle Times. You can find more photos here or read the article here.
Congrats, T!
Guest Banana: Vampires, Werewolves, Aliens (and maybe some wizards). Oh my!
/4 Comments/in Fun, Guest Banana, Nerd Herd /by MeganAs I tend to be from time to time, I’ve been a bit overwhelmed with all of these dang responsibilities that being a mom, wife, IT consultant, Power Point operator, writer and primetime television watcher entails. So, in order to ease the burden a bit, I’ve decided to ask people to be Guest Bananas, AKA guest writers on this site. This Guest Banana post was written by my good friend, and fellow watcher of awful television, Mara. Take it away, Mara!
Well hello there interweb. If you have followed the wonderful Crazybananas for a while, you will know me as “The Mara”. I used to leave 17 page comments on posts, usually having nothing to do with the actual post itself and just updating Megan and her followers on my college days. I was awesome. Megan has asked me, knowing my awesomeness, to guest post on her wonderful website as she is busy being a wonderful mother, wife and working girl (not prostitute) [ed note: Thanks for clarifying that I’m not a prostitute, Mara] and not to mention growing a Pirate King in her womb. Her life is crazy and I am thankful for every day that I get to spend time with her and her beautiful family. Enough gushing about her, seriously though, look at the freaking family pictures. Like, are you kidding me!?
It took me 2 seconds to determine what I wanted to write about, it went something like this (via text):
So, I’m sitting here trying to determine how to organize my thoughts about the following topics: vampires, werewolves, aliens and wizards (preferably of the Ginger variety). This is hard. I could write on and on and on and on about the things that entertain me the most. I’ll keep it short and sweet…yea, right.
Wizards:
“I’d be sleazy for Ron Weasley”- Yes. Yes, I would. Especially the older, not as awkward, super adorable Ron Weasley. Damn that Hermione Granger. What can I say? I have a thing for awkward Gingers.
As for the Harry Potter Series? Thank you for existing. I am going to cry like a 3 year old when the second movie for The Deathly Hallows comes out. It really can’t be ending, really!? Ugh. The books are amazingly written and while the movies have rarely lived up to my standards they are amazing as well. I highly recommend those who are obsessed with the Twilight series to check out an actual well written series of awesomely addicting books that don’t make you feel like your IQ has dropped 90 points.
Vampires and Werewolves:
I love vampires. I also love werewolves. Now please don’t confuse this with me believing that vampires and werewolves exist. While it is entirely possible and would be awesome, my common sense does take over, sometimes. Megan introduced me to Twilight and Moonlight which opened the flood gates to all popular vampire “pop culture†(True Blood, Vampire Diaries, etc). And for that, I am eternally grateful. Seriously. I have had some of the best times hanging out with my BFF’s, drinking (even not drinking sometimes, I know, weird, right!?) and watching awesomely bad vampire shows/movies. They are cheesy, drama filled and full of smoking hot men. Delicious. I’m not sure what I’m trying to get across here except that I think these series/sagas have taught me to not take myself too seriously. If I had, I would have missed out on lots of laughs and good times with friends. For a future post I will prepare an essay comparing Twilight, Moonlight, True Blood and Vampire Diaries and have Megan post it as she will be busy being a mom for the second time (yay!!). This is something I’ve joked about for awhile but I really should get a start on it, because, really, what else do I have to do?
Aliens:
One word: Roswell. [Ed note: The clips in this section are different…yes I know the screen caps look the same. F’ing Hulu. Trust, you want to click on both. The truth is out there. Wait, wrong aliens…]
Introduced into my life by, guess who!? (Who else thinks that Megan introduces these things to my life to ensure herself a bad/cheesy T.V./movie watching buddy? I do. But I love it.) Roswell thoroughly entertained me for the 2 days it took me to watch the entire series. Alright, alright, it was more than 2 days but honestly if I didn’t have to work or sleep, I would have just watched every episode straight through. That good. And cheesy. And full of hotness monsters (and Max’s body, holy cow. Take your shirt off more often, please!?). Aliens do exist. As current events prove, they are watching/deactivating nuclear weapons. Awesome. Anywho, Roswell is about normal teenagers just trying to live their lives. Half of them are aliens: Max, Michael and Isabel. Michael, by far the fan favorite, is the bad boy. With the bad hair, which ends up being charming…well in that cheesy way. Teenage angst ensues. Really that’s all you need to know. They battle with the same problems as normal teenagers: relationships, lisps, parent problems and money woes, but better because they aren’t from this planet!
Shocking and amazing! I suggest and encourage the renting/buying of these DVD’s and maybe starting a website to get the cast back together for a movie reunion (I would, but I’m too lazy). That would be awesome and I would pee my pants with excitement!!
Alright, summation time, I love wizards, werewolves, vampires and aliens. The above is a scrabble brained attempt to show this. Also, Megan has destroyed any chance of me living a normal life. Harsh but true. Most of the above obsessions have occurred because of or have increased in nature due to the lovely blonde lady with the beautiful family. She has convinced me (really twisting my arm and forcing me) to watch every Cutting Edge (except one that even Megan deemed unwatchable) and 2 of the 3 Step Up films. Yes, I called them films. It just gets better and better. And to her I say, Thank you. Thank you for letting me be me and ensuring me a safe place, without criticism to enjoy the nerdy things in life. And thank you to all the creative people that have brought these characters to life for me to enjoy. Seriously, I wish I had a quarter of the imagination of J.K. Rowling.
Interweb, watch some vampires, werewolves, aliens and wizards, laugh and enjoy life, don’t take it too seriously.
Until next time, if I’m ever invited back!