Today the Demons are Ice Skating in Hell

When I was eight-years-old, my parents forced me to switch from my fun, open-minded public school to a conservative Catholic school. My little brother was about to start kindergarten, and he was, well, a bit difficult. My parents were afraid that he would get lost in the public school system, and since they wanted their kids to go to the same school, I had to move as well. My first year I absolutely hated it. There was praying and church and political talk for second graders. There were old computers and bad music equipment since our school was not funded by the state. Photos of Jesus peered down from every corner, daring you to sin. And the kids were just plain mean. Sure, I had a few friends here and there, but most everyone had formed tight cliques from their first day of kindergarten and were fairly unwilling to let a new, dorky, blond, space shuttle t-shirt wearing girl into their groups. It didn’t help that I was about a foot taller than everyone in my class. I was the epitomy of a geek.

In third grade there was a girl in my class I hadn’t met before. She was loud. And talkative. And she never shut up. Did I mention she was loud? But she was so nice to me, space shuttle t-shirts and all. Her name was Theresa and we became fast friends. If I was a smarter woman, I’d have an illustrative photo to put underneath this paragraph, but I’ve been busy and my scanner is broken, so you all will just have to visualize the vast dorkiness that permeated our friendship. She of the black, rimmed glasses and I of the buck teeth. I’m amazed we weren’t child models.

You can’t tell, but this is our class picture. I’m in the bottom row looking all emo. Please note Jesus menacingly staring over her shoulder…shudder.

Through the years we’ve had our ups and downs, both personally and within our friendship. But for some reason, she still stayed my buddy, even when she moved to the homeland, my most coveted New York City. She is the kind of friend that I don’t see all that often, maybe once a year, but will send me a letter on mother’s day congratulating me on becoming a wonderful mother. She is the kind of friend who will go an hour out of her way on a random Wednesday because I call her and tell her my favorite internet writer will be at a bar in Brooklyn signing autographs and could she get one for me. And she is the kind of friend that forgave me when I had to make an impossible choice between her and another important person in my life. A person that understood why I had to make the decision I did and even though she was hurt, comforted me about my choice. A person who, in the sea of conservative balony that is the state of Kansas, was a liberal. Someone I could actually have a political discussion with and not want to rip out my eyeballs and feed them to my dog.

Work it. Totally fierce.

Gah, now I’m getting all weepy!

A few years ago Theresa and I got into one of our discussions about marriage. She, personally, never wanted to get married. She didn’t feel she wanted or needed marriage or some guy to fulfill her life. She wanted to join the Peace Corps and do amazing things and travel, and she felt that wouldn’t be possible if she was married. She didn’t want kids or a life that held her back from the good she could do in the world. And (in my opinion) she didn’t think she deserved to have it all.

[Insert requisite joke about them being really hot here]

But then she met Jonathan. A sweet, shy architect in NYC who swept her off her feet. He wasn’t an alcoholic, workoholic, sexaholic, commitment-phobic, peeping tom, megalomaniac, emotional fuckwit, or pervert. And her ideas about marriage slowly started to change.

Tomorrow we head off for our weekend adventure in NYC to attend what I’m sure will be a gorgeous wedding. I mean, who has a wedding reception on the great lawn of Central Park? Seriously, who does that? Answer, that girl in the black rimmed glasses who never believed in marriage. I believe Hell has frozen over.

This picture has nothing to do with anything. I just thought it was a great group costume idea. Halloween, 2007, The Kennedy Family. L to R: Teddy, Jackie O, JFK, John John and Marilyn. I’m also posting to show the awesomeness that is Theresa’s sister’s hair. I am quite jealous of her cool factor. Mine is currently at negative 2 and in need of a boost!

All photos stolen borrowed from Theresa’s Facebook page, therefore causing me to reactivate my Facebook account. Damn you, Theresa!